Free range

Free-range.

Where I'm from, clean and green New Zealand, we know 'free-range' as natural, organic and most commonly animals who get to roam around freely, eat the 'organic' grass that is growing around the garden and live happy 'holistic' lives.  Take chickens for example; their eggs are eaten daily by the family (yum, yokes as yellow as the sun!). They get given no 'evil' pesticides, antibiotics, hormones, and get to grow to a ripe old age, until they disappear once they are plump enough to be eaten at the Xmas table.

Not in Bolgatanga .......

In fact I came face to face with 'free-range' when I was driving to work on my moto last week..... A grandmas butt up in the air, buttocks flowing in the wind, and shit coming out in front of my eyes! "WHAT! " I  hear you cry! Yes! And this is before 8am, before my second coffee of the day, and before I had a chance to turn my head so I no longer get haunted by that memory! I was in shock! 

'Free-range' is what many of the locals do here, they poo everywhere!   One day I decided to go and see the river in town, but I couldn't get to it because of too much human faeces. And now I don't walk through fields or in any green leafy patches, just in case!

Old ladies shitting, men shitting, kids shitting, dogs, goats, donkeys shitting, I have seen them all!

Sometimes I feel as if I just don't fit in! He he

At the hospital I work in, people even 'free-range' just outside the ward window or next to where the nurses put IVL's in, despite security telling them off.... They are unstoppable!

I have heard the problem is, people are just so used to it.  Some don't have toilets in their house, and there are no public toilets, so you can't blame them.
But weirdly, even at mama laadis, where the kids know better, they have toilets, they have soap, they will still sneak out and go 'free-range'.  I know cause I saw them too! (wish those visuals would disappear) 

Why?
Maybe I should conduct a survey?

Madam... I see you are shitting right now.... Can you please explain why?  Madam ... You are shitting in front of small children and in public view, next to public toilets... Can you please yell my why? Ohhhh why???

Free-range has problems.... especially now it's hammattan.  Everyone is having diarrhea and vomiting.  These people are 'free-ranging' (I just created my own verb!), and the bugs spread... Then the hammattan wind picks up, dust blows this diarrhea in the wind, and innocents (like moi) breath in the mix of dust/wind/faecal matter into their perfectly innocent 'free-range-free body!  It just doesn't seem legal!  It certainly brings a new meaning to 'blowing in the wind!' ha ha

In fact writing this I feel slightly short of breath, .... I have a cough coming on.... I start sweating in realization .....oh no .... my mask fell off my face last night whilst i was driving my moto..... Oh no...... Free-range faecal pneumonia! ...... Ahhhhh


Photos to be posted in upcoming blogs! Ha ha